In which Bow is taken in by a stupid trick involving someone pretending to be a tree.
This week opens with Catra, Scorpia and Imp taking control of some stupid kingdom or other, called Elfwood. They capture the King, but make the elementary mistake of letting his son Storm escape, which I think guarantees their failure before anything can even get going. Sure enough, Storm runs all the way to find the rebels, and quickly teams up with a female member of the Rock People, who has the unlikely and possibly misheard name of Flaccid.
In Whispering Wood, Adora, Bow, Glimmer and Kowl are conducting a meeting with a complete nutbar called Prince Arkeon, who is also an elf. Arkeon comes from a local elf kingdom, but does not agree with his father’s policies, because his father is too serious. Arkeon just wants to have adventure and fun, but based on his behaviour in this scene, I can understand why his father might not want him around.
This less-than-enthralling, and in fact downright odd, scene comes to a close when Storm comes along, having evidently abandoned Flaccid somewhere along the way. He begs for help, which the rebels – unfortunately including Arkeon – happily agree to provide. They all pop along to Elfwood, where they find the Horde using large mining machinery to extract crystal from the neighbouring mountains.
Catra very quickly captures She-Ra inside a crystal dome from which she cannot escape, and you cannot believe how satisfying it is to see the smug smirk wiped from She-Ra’s face when she realises she’s actually been bested. It doesn’t last long beyond the commercial break, unfortunately, but it was still possibly the highlight of my day. If you want to know, She-Ra gets out thanks to Flaccid, who re-enters the episode at this point and smashes the crystal. She also reveals that she’s called Granita, not Flaccid, and I must admit it’s quite demented that I managed to mishear her name that badly.
While this excitement has been going on, Scorpia has successfully managed to defeat Glimmer, Bow, Kowl, Storm and Arkeon, and put them to work in the crystal mines. Another Rock Person, Stone-Dar, appears at this juncture to rescue them, which is nice, and then the episode dribbles its way to some kind of conclusion by way of Arkeon and Storm both being really scared, but getting over their fears. By this stage, I was way past caring.
In today’s adventure…
No sign of Loo-Kee for me today, but that’s because it turns out that he was hiding in the Whispering Wood with only his nose poking out from behind a rock. For reasons only marginally connected to the episode, he recommends that we thank our parents or tell them that we love them. In complete fairness, I’m not sure what moral lesson this mess of an episode was trying to dispense was, but I’m relatively convinced that it was nothing to do with parents.
In case you desperately need to know who was in this rubbish, then I can here reveal that it was Adora, She-Ra, Swift Wind, Bow, Glimmer, Kowl, Arkeon, Storm, Granita (or Flaccid, if you prefer), Stone-Dar, Loo-Kee, the King of Elfwood, Catra, Scorpia, Mantenna and Imp. As in another episode relatively recently, I didn’t notice Spirit but I assume he was around because Swift Wind definitely is.
Excuse given for Adora’s disappearance
“You go on ahead. I’ll see if I can find She-Ra. We’re going to need her help,” Adora says. It’s so simple, but outstandingly effective.
Catra achieves a personal best by ensuring that the fourth word of the episode is an insult, though unfortunately it’s only the generic “fools”, directed at some Horde Troopers. She also finds time to call Imp a “headache” and complain that she is surrounded by “empty-headed, know-nothing, worthless fools”, in reference to Imp and Scorpia. There was also a scene in which she was definitely insulting Mantenna, but I couldn’t hear a word she said because the music was way too loud.
Elsewhere, there’s Storm calling some Horde Troopers the ubiquitous “rotten robots”, Imp describing Bow, Glimmer and Kowl as “rebel fools”, and Scorpia describing the same party as “rebel rats”. I should also probably mention that there’s a strange scene in which Arkeon pretends to be a tree and tells Bow that he’s “not too bright”. Bow retaliates aggressively, calling the tree an “overgrown splinter”.
Egg on your face?
Bet you’d forgotten this section existed. Bow begins his appearance this week by leaping into a tree and shaking it until all the fruit falls out. Naturally, some of it lands on his head and explodes. I debated long and hard whether to put this here in Egg on your face? or in Oh No, Bow!, before deciding that I’d put it in both, for maximum piss-taking.
Oh No, Bow!
In what appears to be a misguided effort to impress Adora and Glimmer, Bow leaps into a tree and shakes all the fruit out of it, only stopping when a big ripe red fruit lands on his head. There you go – told you I’d put it in both sections. Bow then embarks on a strange trip into mental ineptitude by falling for an all-too-obvious trick in which Prince Arkeon pretends to be the tree and talks to Bow. This whole section of the episode is, it has to be said, really quite odd.
Does it have the Power?
No, it doesn’t. Most of the time it feels like it’s just going through the motions, without bothering to have much in the way of a plot, and yet at the same time it feels like it’s got loads of ingredients thrown into it without any kind of idea what they should be doing. The appearance of the Rock People seems pretty gratuitous, and the plotlines about Arkeon and Storm being scared are suddenly tacked on, and don’t do much when they do emerge. On the other hand, Catra is at her scheming and malicious best; it feels like a long time since we’ve seen her take centre-stage, and her capture of She-Ra is, just about, worth the price of admission. Especially if you’re watching on You Tube, where there is no price of admission.
And that’s your lot for a couple of weeks; there’ll be no more updates here until the second week of May.