Episode 83 – She-Ra Makes a Promise

In which Bow might as well rename himself Captain Obvious.

This episode begins with a really random scene where all the rebels argue about what their favourite food is. With the sole exception of one of the Twiggets, they eventually agree that they all very much enjoy some weird foodstuff called golden spuffles. I am sure your lives are greatly enriched by your acquisition of this information. Anyway, the Twigget who hates spuffles suddenly decides that he fancies Adora’s pants off, so he decides to go and get some spuffles for her.

Twiggets: “Nice to get the limelight for a change. Allows us to show off that we’re insane.”

Unfortunately, golden spuffles only grow on the banks of a river in the Fright Zone, which means the stupid Twigget – whose name is Sprocker – gets himself captured pretty much immediately. His captor is Octavia, that green tentacled lady we last saw ages ago in Treasures of the First Ones. Her big idea is to use Sprocker as bait to capture She-Ra, which is such a stunningly original plan that Hordak agrees to it at once.

Hordak sends Adora a note to explain that the rebels will never see Sprocker again, unless She-Ra shows up at the Fright Zone, unaccompanied, unarmed, and mentally unbalanced. He doesn’t actually say that last bit, in case I needed to clarify there. Adora decides that she has no choice, so she pops off into the woods and transforms into She-Ra.

Once She-Ra gets to the Fright Zone, Hordak promises to release Sprocker and never attack the rebels again, if She-Ra will promise to place herself under arrest, never try to escape, and obey all Hordak’s commands to the letter. She-Ra agrees to these terms and is escorted out to the dungeons, while Hordak keeps his word and releases Sprocker.

She-Ra: “You idiot. I don’t even like those stupid golden spuffle things. I was just saying that to shut you lot up.”

Locked in her cell, She-Ra decides to escape – but then realises that she has made a promise, and will not break it. She instead concludes that the best thing to do is stand around in the dungeon shouting, “He-Man! He-Man! I need help!” Yes you do, She-Ra, but not in the way you think. Anyway, He-Man astoundingly manages to hear She-Ra, and enthusiastically appears on Etheria to bust her out of prison.

In the meantime, Hordak has violated his side of the bargain by capturing Bow, Madame Razz and Broom. He’s also, somewhat unusually, taken the trouble to arrest Bow’s horse, though I suppose in fairness the horse does have a bigger brain than Bow does. He carts them off to Beast Island, which means He-Man and She-Ra have to go to Beast Island as well and bring them back. After they’ve dealt with that, He-Man and She-Ra stare at each other with expressions suggesting that they have the sort of sibling love that society isn’t prepared to accept.

He-Man: “Incest is just a social construct, maaan.”

In today’s adventure…

I feel like the animators couldn’t be bothered trying to hide Loo-Kee today, since the episode’s very first shot is a massive close-up of his face. His advice today is that it’s okay if we feel a sort of sexual feeling for our siblings, but it’s probably best if we don’t act on it, and it’s better yet if we could move to a planet in a different dimension to avoid temptation.

Once again, of course, I’m lying, but my idea was about 100 billion times more interesting than Loo-Kee’s drivel, which is that we must always tell our parents where we’re going. I must have missed this episode as a child, since I have been known to go on holiday for two weeks without telling my parents, and if I’d seen this episode and learned this lesson, I’d never do that.

Loo-Kee: “Only 10 episodes left, and then you’ll never have to see me again.”

Character checklist

Okay, lads, we’ve got Adora, Spirit, She-Ra, Swift Wind, Prince Adam, He-Man, Bow, Kowl, Madame Razz, Broom, Sprocker, the other Twiggets, Loo-Kee, Hordak, Octavia, Mantenna, Imp, and some Horde Troopers.

Insults

Madame Razz considers Sprocker a “scallywag”, which is exceptionally mild. I think he’s a dick. Hordak starts off imaginatively, with “armour-plated pop-eye” for Mantenna, but he all too quickly lapses back into old habits, by calling Mantenna a “fool” and addressing Bow and Madame Razz as “fools” as well. Bow retaliates by referring to the entire Horde as “cowards”.

Oh No, Bow!

When Adora receives Hordak’s note asking She-Ra to come unarmed to the Fright Zone, Bow chirps up, “It could be a trap!” You know what, Bow, you might be on to something there. You’re right. It definitely COULD be a trap. There’s certainly an outside possibility, isn’t there? That’s a degree of prescience bordering on the fucking supernatural you’ve got going on there, Bow. It’s a wonder MI5 haven’t recruited Bow, given his uncanny grasp of the subtleties of counter-intelligence.

To put it another way – of course it’s a trap, you complete and total tool. Now shut up, unless you’ve got anything to contribute, which we all know you haven’t.

Bow: “I wonder if maybe this is a trap too?”

Does it have the Power?

This one clearly started out in the writer’s room as a quite interesting notion. I like the idea of She-Ra being forced into making a bargain with Hordak, but frankly that’s the only good thing about this episode. The setup to the promise bit is less than compelling: the golden spuffles nonsense is completely random, and She-Ra could have easily rescued Sprocker and done a runner without having to enter into any kind of deal. Once she’s locked up, she does agonise a little about breaking the promise, but seems to think that calling on He-Man to rescue her does not constitute trying to escape. She’s then let off the hook all too easily because Hordak goes back on his side of the deal: it could have been an interesting episode if She-Ra had had to choose to break her promise when Hordak had kept his. All in all, we have a missed opportunity here, which is somehow more frustrating than the episodes that never had a hope of being any good. Still, there’s enough of a decent effort here to make it worth a watch.

One thought on “Episode 83 – She-Ra Makes a Promise

  1. Perhaps this would have worked better as a Masters of the Universe episode, since we’ve seen in “The Problem with Power” that He-Man tends to be more guilt-prone.

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