Episode 56 – Save Our City

In which Mara and Critta prove far more interesting than He-Man and Skeletor.

We’re back on Necron again this week, and Critta’s still hanging out with the Gleanons, with another super plan to help the Gleanons defeat the Mites. She doesn’t specify exactly what the plan is, but General Niffle evidently thinks it’s a good one, since he feels confident enough to make Critta the Queen of the Gleanons – conditional upon the plan’s success. Being Queen of the Gleanons apparently involves putting on a new outfit, which consists of bra, pants, thigh-high boots, and a weird yellow hat.

Critta: “Ta-da! What do you think?”

Mara’s new ambassadorial posting evidently doesn’t involve a lot of work, since she too has taken the time to give herself a complete makeover. She’s opted for a funky new hairstyle, a very sensible latex leotard, and a large gold bracelet around her right thigh. It’s something of a departure from her previous outfit, but be that as it may, she quickly gets wind of Critta’s presence and calls home to Primus to request backup.

Before backup can arrive, however, Critta’s plan begins to unfold. The Gleanons – who have sensibly built their capital city in the crater of an active volcano – contact the Mites to request help because the volcano has begun to erupt. This, of course, is a complete falsehood, and to her credit, Mara is 99% sure it’s a trick. The remaining 1% of doubt, however, and the possibility that thousands of lives may be at risk, leads her to recommend that the Mites deploy their ships to help evacuate the Gleanons. The Mite leader, President Pel, agrees.

Never ones for subtlety, the Gleanons attack the Mite fleet the moment it arrives at the capital. Mara’s squadron puts up a valiant fight, but rather unfortunately, Critta manages to down Mara’s fighter, and Mara herself is captured and sent as a slave to the Gleanon mines, along with Vice-President Etor and a fair number of other Mites.

Mara: “I fear my new and rather less practical outfit isn’t going to serve me well in these mines.”

Luckily, He-Man is on the way, and we all know how quickly he can resolve problems like this. He shows up at the mines just as Mara and Etor have run into a spot of bother with their escape attempt, and once he’s on the scene, there’s no need to worry. Once he’s busted Mara and the other Mites out, they all go speeding off to the Mite capital, which is under attack from Critta and General Niffle.

Mara gets into a fight with Critta, while He-Man occupies himself with throwing General Niffle off the top of a very high building. This is enough to make the Gleanons sound the retreat signal, and they all scoot off, leaving the Mites to crown Mara queen. This means she gets a tacky golden crown to match her tacky leotard and tacky thigh bracelet.

He-Man: “Er, I helped too, you know. Perhaps I should be king?”

 

In today’s adventure…

Prince Adam and Mara treat us to a hilarious little skit in which Adam burns himself because he doesn’t check the temperature of the water before he puts his hands in. This little sequence is most notable for the appalling animation of Adam, who looks like he’s been endowed with a hefty pair of tits.

Prince Adam: “Not sure why I’m trying to shake hands with you.”

 

Character checklist

After last week’s extravaganza, we’ve got a pretty tight cast list today, featuring only Prince Adam, He-Man, Mara, President Pel, Vice-President Etor, Critta, General Niffle, and various Mites and Gleanons.

 

Excuse given for Prince Adam’s disappearance

Adam is all alone in a room at transformation time, so he doesn’t see the need to give an excuse. I wonder if he’ll be more into excuses in the 2002 revival series, which is getting ever closer on the horizon, thank Christ.

 

Insults

General Niffle tells his Gleanon troops that they are “fools”, and describes the entire Mite race as “stupid Mites” and “fools”. Critta, meanwhile, refers to Mara as a “goody-goody” and a “weakling”, only one of which turns out to be true. You may try to guess which.

Critta: “I somehow don’t see this ending well for me.”

 

Does it have the Power?

This one’s a winner, and loath as I am to say it, it’s probably because Skeletor isn’t in it at all, and He-Man barely features. He-Man isn’t at all interesting in this series, and Skeletor’s not been holding my interest lately – whereas Mara and Critta are both very interesting characters, and these Mite and Gleanon stories are pretty decent, even if they do feel entirely disconnected from the normal He-Man universe. Unencumbered by irritating characters like the scientists, Flipshot, Master Sebrien and the Sorceress, this series feels like it’s come into its own in this setting. This episode regrettably had the air of finality about it, however, so I’ll be surprised if we return to Necron. Only time will tell.

Episode 53 – Balance of Power

In which Mara gets a new job.

Some opening narration sets the scene this week: we’re on the planet Necron, which is populated by two races. The Mites are peaceful and allied with Primus, while the Gleenons are distinctly unpleasant and as such are allied with the Mutants. As we begin, Critta is visiting the Gleenons’ leader, General Niffle, to negotiate the sale of transium ore, which the Gleenons are planning to obtain by invading the Mites’ mine. Since the Gleenons don’t know where the mine is, their first step in this plan is to kidnap the President of the Mites. With Critta’s help, they easily achieve this.

Critta: “This is somehow not how I saw my life going.”

It’s at this point that the Starship Eternia arrives, bearing He-Man, Sagittar, Hydron, Flipshot, Mara and Beamo, the Mite ambassador to Primus. Mara and Beamo are getting on very well, which prompts Flipshot to make some remarks implying that he thinks Mara and Beamo are sleeping with each other. This seems unlikely, since Beamo resembles nothing so much as a two-foot-tall cross between a frog and a teddy bear, and I’ve never really thought Mara would be into that sort of deviancy.

Anyway, less about Mara’s sexual predilections, and more about the Mites and Gleenons. When the Starship Eternia lands, our heroes are met by the Vice-President, who fills them in on the capture of the President and explains that the Gleenons will release him in exchange for being told where the transium mine is. The Vice-President intends to attack the Gleenons with the full force of the Mites in what he knows is a hopeless attempt to recover the President.

He-Man: “Got to admit, these Mites have a banging home cinema setup.”

He-Man offers an alternative: he and the Galactic Guardians will sneak into the Gleenon’s capital and rescue the President, hopefully without even being seen. Pleasingly, Mara comes along too, which is nice because the Galactic Guardians have been a bit of an all-boys club to this point. She even proves to be quite useful, which is even more pleasing.

Immediately on arrival in the city, of course, our heroes are captured by General Niffle and Critta, who lock them up with the President. This doesn’t prove to be a problem, thanks to Flipshot pulling the old “oh-god-I’m-really-ill” trick, which distracts the Gleenons long enough for He-Man to beat the living daylights out of them.

With the President rescued, He-Man and the Galactic Guardians prepare to depart for Primus. Before they go, however, the President invites Mara to take up the position of Priman ambassador to Necron. Mara agrees, but only on the condition that Beamo goes back to Primus to be the ambassador there. This can only mean one of two things: Mara and Beamo definitely aren’t sleeping together, or they definitely are but Mara doesn’t enjoy it one bit.

Mara: “So, wait, I’ve got to live here? With these guys?”

In today’s adventure…

Flipshot is showing off as usual, riding around on Caz’s hoverboard. He-Man is luckily on hand for the inevitable moment when he falls off. After saving Flipshot, He-Man is kind enough to advise us all to always wear protective knee and elbow pads when we’re riding skateboards, otherwise we won’t look cool when we fall off. I think anyone taking advice from He-Man is way past the point where they care about being cool.

Character checklist

He-Man, Sagittar, Hydron, Flipshot, Mara, Beamo, the Mite President, Critta, General Niffle, and of course plenty of other Mites and Gleenons.

He-Man: “Soooo REACH FOR THE STARS!”

Excuse given for Prince Adam’s disappearance

I’m beginning to wonder if we’ll ever see Adam again. His appearances are erratic, to say the least, and he doesn’t contribute anything to the episodes he is in, the one exception being You’re in the Army Now, which was possibly the best use of Adam ever. Anyway, enough of these irrelevant musings: my point is that Adam isn’t seen or mentioned in this episode.

Insults

Everything was going swimmingly, until General Niffle ruined it in the last two minutes by telling all his guards that they are “fools”.

Does it have the Power?

Very much so. I liked this episode a lot. It’s a simple, straightforward adventure yarn, which tells its story entertainingly. Nobody gets on my nerves, and there’s even the possibility raised at the end that the Gleenons might change their ways and stop being so aggressive. It’s interesting to give Mara a change in role, and I wonder if this means we’ll never see her again. I also really liked Critta’s scenes this week: she’s always come across as the most intelligent of the Mutants, and seems to have her own plans that don’t necessarily fit in with Flogg’s and Skeletor’s. She reminds me slightly of Evil-Lyn. All in all, this is a great little episode that sets out to tell a decent story, and tells it well.